I LOST THE MOST HUMBLE, TRUSTING MAN IN MY LIFE...

July 5, 2010 by far is the most memorable day for me! If anyone can explain being sad & happy at the same time I'll do so. The day I married my husband was the day I also had the privilege to gain another family. A brand new set of parents and a bunch of siblings. My husbands parents took me under their wing because my parents had split and I appreciated them for that. I'm not gonna lie I became just a bit jealous when we had family functions w/ my in laws. Especially because our family was exactly the same way. So close & caring. My father in law was a very wise man. He gave even when he had nothing. He contributed a helping had even when he physically knew he couldn't. I see the same traits in my husband. He raised his children very well and I thank him for that. I am honored to have had him in my life. Especially in my kids lives. He was such a great example to us all.

The night my father in law went into the hospital I got a call. My husband and I had just gotten off of work and it was around 1 am. SO when I got the call my heart started pounding because no one wants to receive a call that late because it's always bound to be bad news. Sure enough it was. My sister in law asked to talk to my husband and I anxiously waited for him to get off so he can tell me what was going on. His face told me it wasn't good. When he told me his dad was in ICU I literally went blank. I called my sister and asked her to grab my kids from my in laws so they would be able to see their father in the hospital. Then I started getting updates via text message about his health and he wasn't doing too well. He had so much things wrong w/ him. He had pneumonia and he was bleeding from his stomach. When I told my husband what was going on he broke down and cried. I've only seen my husband cry once and that was when his baby was in the hospital for surgery. It's hard seeing your spouse be so emotional when you normally don't see them that way. My heart went out for him. I started looking for flight reservations for him. He kept blaming himself for not being out there w/ his dad through out his last days. We have lived in Utah for 3 years now and he felt they were wasted. I felt guilty because I was the one who made the move out here and always felt like I took him away from his family. So of course I shared the guilt w/ him. So now I knew I had to be the one to make the most decisions because he wasn't thinking rational now. He wanted to drive down that very night. Being we just got off of work we were in no state to drive for that long. I drove him to fedex to use the computers so I can make his flight. Told him what the plan was going to be and sent him off.

When I took him to the airport I felt like I was letting him go. My husband and I were out here in Utah for the summer alone because my mother in law asked to have her grand kids stay. I was iffy but felt like it was the right thing to do since they won't see them all year. It's times like these where heavenly father proves everything happens for a reason. So when letting my husband go down to cali was hard for me because I was left alone to worry about him, my kids and my father in law. I cried so hard. When I walked away I watched him from a far trying to cherish every moment. He must have felt my pain because he looked straight at me as if he knew where I was hiding to watch him go. lol He blew me a kiss and waved good bye. A moment I'll cherish forever.

My husband called me from out there to let me know he was in the hospital w/ his father. He cried and thanked me for flying him out. I didn't do anything apart from doing what every wife should do. I of course stayed behind to work so we wouldn't financially burden his family. I thought it was the best thing to do. Being that my husband was out there made me feel he can at least know he was there to see God take him away. I miss him just talking about him. Things won't be the same. He glued our family together always. No fight or argument was important enough to lose ties w/ each other. He always made sure we reconciled things so we can "Live One Vision Everyday". L-O-V-E (Live One Vision Everyday) was a quote my father in law always said. He was a very wise man.

So now I'm stuck here trying to figure out how I can get down to California. Like most people in the world I live paycheck to paycheck. So I'm hoping my mom or dad can come through for me. I'm keeping myself occupied though. My sister Lepa and I are making pins for the family. I'm planning on giving it to them as a gift from me on the day of the service. It's home made of course so hope they will like it. I used the last 40 bucks to my name for them. Here are samples.



This one is going to be for my mother in law and the bottom is for the siblings. I didn't fix the sibling one because it's supposed to say Live One Vision Everyday but I fixed it on the actual project. lol My husband wanted his own so I'm making one of him and his dad. I'm planning on putting ribbon around it and just play around w/ it til' I like how it comes out. I will take a picture of the finished project when I'm done.





To my father in law I will try my best to continue taking care of your son and your grand kids. I love you always!